Goodbye.

Today I leave New York.

I leave a far different person than as I came 11 weeks ago.

What I take from here is invaluable.

I thought I was here to learn about family. And I was. And I did.

Family was something I observed. I witnessed how healthy ones worked…from younger ones to one that had been running for over 25 years.

It was something I needed to see. And the lessons I take from what I witnessed won’t be fully known until that unseen day down the road when I find myself with a family of my own.

But more than witnessing, observing and gleaning from family…I was embraced in family.

From the first night I arrived to the last, I was loved as part of the family. Perhaps I didn’t recognize it fully until this week, but I well know that I leave behind some friends who truly are more like sisters and brothers.

And I now also well know that I return to two parents who deeply love and care for their youngest daughter. And I return to a brother and sister (and talk to the other sister) whose love and loyalty for their little sis runs deep.

But aside from all these family-related lessons, I learned and grew in other areas, in ways I don’t fully know but am aware that something was started in me.

Like in Spain. I was stretched and had to step out of the box I had so comfortably resided in for so long. I mean, this girl who doesn’t like getting up in front of groups and speaking about anything personal not only talked to a church but stood on a box and shouted for all in the plaza to hear. And that’s only a part of it. A new work was started in me indeed.

And in all that I learned and in all the areas where there’s been growth, perhaps the most valuable, and certainly the hardest and most costly of all lessons, I learned in my last days here. I am far from having a complete grasp on it (and sincerely doubt that I ever will), but I relish the wisdom I should have sought out long ago. And I am determined to make new habits. I’m not alone in this life. And I don’t have to be. And I shouldn’t be.

And so I leave. I finish up one chapter and stare at the blank page separating this one from the next. I can’t say that I know what’s in store. I can’t even say that I have an inkling, a dream or a hope. I have only the knowledge that as I walk the road…I’m not the only one on it.

So, goodbye New York. With red eyes and a tear-stained face, I load up the last of my things, shut the door to this empty yellow house I called home for a few months, and make the long drive home.

I love you.

And I’ll be back.

How could I not?

We're family.